Adulthood



There is one Spongebob episode where SB desperately wants to behave in a more adult way after being humiliated by laughing customers at the Krusty Krab. All this triggered by Granny Sponge giving Spongebob a smoochy smooch on the forehead in view of all. Granny Sponge wears lipstick more permanent than well... permanent marker. Distraught, SpongeBob runs home crying while trying to rub off pink kiss marks. Who can he turn to in his hour of need but his wiser friend Patrick to help him navigate the waters of maturity. Patrick convinces SB that to be adult, one must appreciate freejazz. The bout of free jazz on KALX makes me SpongeBob- forehead furrowed, wishing nice old granny will feed me warm cookies and milk instead.



All weekend I was thinking of cookies made with love and care. On Saturday I got a few from Massa's. They are a fine bakery no doubt, but their cookies are professional with none of that homey tender flavor. So I bravely took out 2 blocks of butter for chocolate chip coconut oatmeal treats. I patted the dough down in heart shapes, but the excess butter melted them down to suspicious blob shapes.

Stitched



C had possibly the world's most efficient wisdom teeth extraction ever. Dr. Ng, conviniently located a few blocks from work in the heart of Oakland Chinatown, was rotating between 2 other clients, and had cracked and pried 2 teeth loose in 4 minutes flat. Everyone in the office was running from mouth to mouth.



Prior to meeting C for surgery, my web research on post oral surgery support uncovered the dreaded condition known as dry sockets. I kept demanding to check for dry sockets, but C kept his lips mum.

Nextfest '04 Time Warp Back to Mid-Eighties



So at this point I'm forced to bring forth my geekiness into broad daylight as I squandered a perfectly sunny Saturday afternoon inside a dark sweaty convention hall at NextFest, a Wired-sponsored tech gadgets fair. I made this trek with a willing co-worker all in hopes of seeing ASIMO; I hope this wasn't my only chance to see Honda's creepy little robot live because... sniffle... I blew it. The sponsors constructed a tight black tent for limiting the robot show to a privileged few(the real geeks who stood in line for half an hour). Late comers like me had to squint in between and past some large sweaty heads at the video screen conveniently positioned at crotch level just outside the tent. Presumably the little fellow does not handle ambient crowd noises too well. The only word which came oft to mind was lame. No I'm not immediately cancelling my Wired subscription- but only because I get it for free.



The future had that mid-80's feel except HDTV did not have hold a booth. How many times can they trot out the conductor wand with the computerized orchestra. This is the last time I'm going to be insulted with either cheesy Vocaloid demos or painful synth music made by twiddling 3 perfume bottles. The future appears to be headed towards more over-engineered gadgets. Even if I'm not jumping up and down to own shoes which makes 5 million computations per second to provide the optimal amount of cushion, still I craved the wow feeling which gives lustre to the future. Currently the only thing in my "calendar of official events outside my control" to look forward to is the return of Haley's comet 2061 and the LOTR ROK extended DVD.



Inside the fiberglass grotto, I tried to touch the hanging bags and shirts woven with fiber which can emit light. Out of nowhere a stern lady materialized to restrain me: Do not touch. I could electrocute myself. I guess future humans will conduct electricity much better. Thankfully this is only Wired's vision of the sponsored future.



Outside the convention hall, I saw for the first time the Segway in action. Two aging couples, civilians unrelated to NextFest, were scootering about in their segways, his and hers.

Flat Stanley Gets Berkled


A cut out paper boy named Flat Stanley arrived through our mailbox last week. Kids  from Pearson Elementary  were sending away flat Stanley(a  boy who gets flattened by a chalk board and travels in envelopes) away as far as they can.  Recipients are instructed to take flat Stanley around, show him a good time, take a few pictures and send him back with the photos as proof of his supposed adventures. .



C and I initially cooked up very exciting San Francisco adventures for Stan. I first got carried away and planned a lost limb or a black eye, real adventures demand tokens. C said we should send Stan back with an earring and a boyfriend. Since the boyfriend might be controversial, C settled for a black T with a tasteful rainbow logo.   But after thoughtful consideration, we sensibly decided to give Stan a more wholesome trip to Point Reyes and maybe a minor sunburn.